Whether we are parents or teachers, guiding and raising children can prove to be confusing, overwhelming and frustrating. We often believe children require a new or different set of management skills that are outside of our expertise. We feel lacking or limited in our capability and effectiveness. Sometimes, the harder we try, the harder it gets. We want answers, strategies, or even tricks (magic) to help us out!
When charting unknown territory, we more often doubt ourselves versus confidently believing in what we already know. For some reason, looking within and trusting our instincts, experience and abilities is not our automatic first response. We spend a good deal of time looking outside, when in fact, we have tremendous resources within us, valuable talents, skills and creative perceptions we can draw upon. Trusting what we have and what we know takes practice.
For this reason, I came up with the acronym TIME – I needed a reminder. I took a workshop 20 years ago that suggested we wear a rubber band around our wrist and every time we had a negative thought, we were to snap the rubber band as a reminder to reverse that thinking. Although the concept was sound, it was a little too Pavlovian for me. Rather than condition myself to respond differently, I preferred to cultivate an organic practice, hence, TIME, trust in my experience, became my mantra.
Life is a continual series of things we have never done before. It is true there are certain skills that require specific training, but our personal experience, knowledge, background and maturity can give us the confidence and tools we need to examine and understand our current circumstances. The irony is TIME takes time … it’s a process not an outcome, it’s a path not a destination. It requires thought, observation and reflection, things that take time. No quick answers or quick fixes, just time and practice.
Think about trusting yourself the next time you run into a roadblock. Is it really meant to stop you, or is it an opportunity to dig deeper?